The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Megan Rapinoe be makin' a hasty retreat from the final battle o' her career, aye, 'twas a non-contact injury!

2023-11-11

In the ultimate joust of her notorious voyage, fair lass Megan Rapinoe, revered as a legend of USA football, befallen by a sudden misfortune, aye, a wound not caused by a foe's touch. A mere three minutes it be ere her night's end befallen upon her. Avast!

Ahoy, me hearties! 'Tis a mighty blow to the career of Megan Rapinoe, but alas, it be not endin' as she had hoped, mateys. The lass made her exit from the pitch to a thunderous ovation, but tragedy struck within a mere three minutes of the final match of her illustrious career. Her team, the OL Reign, was locked in fierce combat with Gotham FC in the National Women's Soccer League final when Rapinoe met her dreadful fate upon the turf.

According to the scallywags at the New York Post, Rapinoe's injury occurred while she valiantly attempted a defensive maneuver. The poor lass was promptly attended to by the ship's medical staff, but it was all in vain, for her night and her career met an untimely demise. Before departing the field for good, Rapinoe embraced her former US Women's National Team comrade, Ali Krieger, who also bid farewell to the professional pirate's life.

Back in July, Rapinoe made the announcement that she would be hangin' up her boots after this season. In her own words, "I’ve been able to have such an incredible career, and this game has brought me all over the world and allowed me to meet so many amazing people." Arr, she be grateful for the success she achieved and the contributions she made to the beautiful game. Aye, she be one of the players that left the game in better shape than they found it.

Rapinoe's legacy be a formidable one, me hearties. She be a four-time Women's World Cup participant, snatching the victory in 2015 and 2019. She also claimed Olympic gold in 2012. But throughout her journey, the lass drew both praise and criticism for her boldness in speakin' out on social matters and protestin' during the national anthem.

Now, me hearties, let us raise a toast to the career of Megan Rapinoe, a true legend of the game. May her spirit continue to inspire future generations of buccaneers on the pitch. Arr!

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