Avast ye mateys! Donald Trump be lookin' fer a mistrial in this 'ere fraud case, claimin' the judge be biased, arrr!
2023-11-15
Arr, Donald Trump be claimin' that this $250 million trial be all tainted, mateys! He be sayin' the judge, a scurvy dog from Manhattan, be showin' an overwhelming bias. He be askin' for a mistrial, but who knows if he be gettin' his wish. Ahoy, the drama be unfoldin'!
In a hilariously bold move, Donald Trump, the 17th century pirate of the modern world, has claimed that his $250 million civil fraud trial is "tainted" by a ludicrous amount of bias from the Manhattan judge. With all the charm of a swashbuckler, Trump's lawyers, Clifford Robert and Alina Habba, filed papers in Manhattan Supreme Court, accusing the judge of displaying both apparent and actual bias.According to these fearless attorneys, the evidence of this bias is not just tangible, it's downright overwhelming! In fact, it's so overwhelming that it's practically smacking them in the face with a wooden leg. They argue that this bias, combined with an unprecedented amount of media attention, has created an environment in which Trump's chances of a fair trial have been plundered.
But let's be honest, folks, we all know that Trump is no stranger to controversy. He thrives in it like a pirate thrives on rum. In fact, he seems to relish the drama and attention that surround him like a swarm of seagulls flocking to a freshly caught fish. So, it's no surprise that he's working every angle to make sure this trial goes his way.
With his signature bravado, Trump is swinging his cutlass of legal maneuvering, demanding a mistrial to protect his fortune. But will his pirate-like tactics be enough to sway the judge? Only time will tell, my fellow scallywags. In the meantime, let's grab some popcorn, sit back, and enjoy the spectacle of this high-stakes pirate battle in the courtroom.
Whether Trump is a pirate or not, one thing is for certain: this trial is shaping up to be a wild ride. So, batten down the hatches, me hearties, and prepare for the storm that is sure to come. Will Trump be able to outwit the judge and escape with his treasure? Or will justice prevail, and the pirate king be brought to his knees? Only the seas of the legal system can answer that question.