Arrr! The Saugus scallywags be tamperin' with citation records, misnamin' those Spanish-surnamed landlubbers to skew the data, arrr!
2023-11-18
Arr, the laws of Massachusetts do be demandin' that the scurvy police gather data about landlubbers who be drivin' their carriages into trouble. But, if the officers be lettin' the scallywags off with nary a piece of paper, they need not keep record of 'em. 'Tis said that this be happenin' in four outta ten stops, savvy? Now, when those officers be writin' a citation, they be obliged to jot down some basic information 'bout the encounter, includin' their reckonin' of the driver's race. The state be grantin' six options for 'em to pick from: White, Black, Hispanic, Asian, Middle..."
In the land of Massachusetts, where the sea meets the shore, the law mandates that the local police keep a watchful eye on the drivers who dare to roam the streets. But fear not, for this law only applies to those who find themselves in the clutches of a written warning or a citation. Verbal warnings, like a whisper in the wind, slip through the cracks like a slippery eel.Now, when a police officer decides to put pen to paper and scribble out a citation, they must also jot down some basic information about the encounter. And one of those bits of information is their perception of the driver's race. Ah, race, the great divider of men, for the state has kindly provided six options to choose from: White, Black, Hispanic, Asian, Middle... (and oh, how I wish to know what lies beyond that ellipsis).
But alas, dear reader, let us not forget the lightheartedness that comes with this tale. For you see, the jesters of the police force estimate that in four out of every ten stops, a mere verbal warning is given. A gentle chiding, a slap on the wrist, and off the driver goes on their merry way. No data to be collected, no races to be guessed, just a friendly reminder to stay on the straight and narrow.
So fret not, my fellow travelers of the roads of Massachusetts. While the law may require some data to be gathered, it seems that the majority of encounters slip through the fingers of bureaucracy. And as we sail on through these tumultuous times, let us remember to keep a keen eye on those who enforce the law, for even in the midst of seriousness, there is always room for a touch of humor.