The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arr, me hearties! The fine chaps at the White House be pleadin' with Congress to give gold to Ukraine, yet nary a word 'bout the migrant mayhem!

2023-12-04

Arr, ye scurvy dogs at the White House be beggin' Congress for more treasure to send to Ukraine, claimin' 'tis all in the name of fightin' Russia. A letter from budget chief Shalanda Young warns that without gold from the landlubbers in Congress, we'll be left high 'n dry. President Joe...

In a jolly message adorned with the flair of a 17th-century pirate, the White House be cheerfully implorin' Congress to cough up more doubloons for Ukraine, mateys! As our beloved Captain Biden continues to navigate the treacherous waters of the migrant crisis, he be needin' all the support he can get for the war, yarrr!
According to a letter obtained by Politico, the clever swashbucklers at the White House be sendin' their budget chief, Shalanda Young, to deliver this urgent message. In her missive, she be advisin' House Speaker Mike Johnson and the leaders of the Senate that unless they take action, our fair ship known as the United States will soon run out of booty to support Ukraine in its battle against the fearsome Russians, arrr!
President Joe, the captain of this fine vessel, be keen on maintainin' our commitments to Ukraine in this conflict. He be knowin' that without proper resources, our brave allies might find themselves walkin' the plank before they know it. So, the White House be beggin' Congress to unlock the treasure chest and provide the necessary funds to keep our noble cause afloat, yarrr!
But fear not, me hearties! The White House be confident that Congress, bein' the jolly good mates they are, will heed this call and come to the rescue. After all, we be sailin' in the same direction, seekin' victory and prosperity for all. So let us raise our mugs of grog and toast to the success of this mission, as we chart our course through the choppy seas of political negotiations, arrr!

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