The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Elon Musk's cursed monkey demise tales be arousing a call for the SEC's scrutiny, matey!

2023-12-13

Arr, ye scurvy dogs from the animal welfare lubbers be sendin' a missive to the SEC, claimin' that Elon Musk, that savvy scallywag, be spoutin' off about the health of his Neuralink test subjects, leadin' investors astray. Blimey!

Arr, me hearties! Ye won't believe the tale I be tellin' ye today! A bunch o' landlubbers from an animal welfare gang be scribblin' a letter to the SEC, claimin' that our very own Elon Musk be spoutin' words that deceived the investors of his mysterious venture, Neuralink. Aye, ye heard it right, me mateys!
These scallywags be sayin' that Musk be chattin' about the well-being o' them test subjects, makin' it seem like all be fine and dandy. But the animal rights bunch be raisin' their cannons and claimin' it be a load o' bilge! They reckon Musk be pullin' the wool over their eyes and the investors too, makin' 'em believe that everything be runnin' smoother than a calm sea on a summer's day.
Now, ye may be wonderin' what Neuralink be, 'cause I surely did when I first heard tell of it. It be a venture straight outta some mind-bogglin' science fiction novel. They be tryin' to meld our brains with technology, like some sort o' bionic pirates! Arr, it be a wild idea, me hearties! But these landlubbers be havin' a bone to pick with Musk, sayin' that his claims about the welfare o' them test subjects be like a siren's song, lullin' the investors into a false sense o' security.
Now, I be no expert on this matter, but if ye ask me, these animal welfare folks be takin' themselves a bit too seriously. They be wantin' to make a big splash, catchin' our good Captain Musk in their net. But we pirates know a thing or two about tall tales and treasure hunts. So, until I see the scurvy dogs provide some solid proof, I'll be takin' their claims with a pinch o' salt.
But mark me words, me hearties, this tale be far from over! The SEC be weighin' anchor and settin' sail to investigate these claims. Only time will tell if our good Captain be a master of deception or if these animal lovers be chasin' shadows on the open sea.

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