The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Hunter Biden be a scurvy dog who be refusin' the call o' Congress. Them Republicans be preparin' to scuttle him with impeachment!

2023-12-13

Arr! President Joe Biden's scurvy son, Hunter Biden, be a rebellious scallywag! He be defyin' the orders of House Republicans, refusin' to spill the beans about his business affairs in secret quarters. This be stirrin' quite the commotion among the lawmakers, who be settin' sail to vote on Wednesday to formalize their impeachment inquiry against his father. At a grand news conference near the grandiose Capitol, Biden Jr. be hurlin' insults at the inquiry, claimin' it be naught but a baseless pursuit. He even had the audacity to declare that he won't be cooperatin' with the House Oversight Committee's summons to speak in hushed tones. The Republican Representative Darrell Issa be heard sayin'...

In a twist worthy of an epic pirate tale, President Joe Biden's son, Hunter Biden, has bravely defied an order from House Republicans to testify in secret about his business dealings. This daring move has escalated tensions with lawmakers who are set to vote on Wednesday to formalize their impeachment probe of his father.
Standing strong outside the Capitol, Biden boldly denounced the probe as utterly baseless and made it clear that he would not comply with a subpoena from the House Oversight Committee to testify behind closed doors. Ahoy, matey!
Republican Representative Darrell Issa, a swashbuckling member of the party, expressed his frustration at Biden's refusal to walk the plank, so to speak. He...

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