The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! A matey from Michigan be sendin' a jolly GIF after the crew triumphs in the national championship!

2024-01-09

Former matey Michigan assistant Connor Stalions belched out one clever GIF after his former crew outgunned Washington to seize the national championship on Monday. Yo ho ho, victory be sweet!

Former Michigan Wolverines football staffer, Connor Stalions, sent a social media post as he watched the team win a national championship against Washington. Stalions had been fired from the team earlier due to his alleged involvement in a sign-stealing scheme. Despite this, he seemed to enjoy the victory and posted a GIF of a man tipping his cap. Stalions had also been seen at the Rose Bowl win over Alabama with former Michigan linebacker Chase Winovich. He had resigned from the staff in November after being accused of being the ringleader of the sign-stealing scheme.

It was reported that Stalions had purchased tickets to over 30 games at 11 different Big Ten schools, including this season. However, Michigan was not playing in any of the games for which Stalions had bought tickets. An unnamed former coach claimed that Stalions had given him money for recordings of the Wolverines' future opponents, which he shared via an iPhone photo album.

Stalions was also alleged to have been on the Central Michigan sideline during a game against Michigan State, wearing a bench credential that said "VB," which stands for visiting bench. This allowed him access to stand between the 20-yard lines, typically reserved for players, coaches, trainers, and equipment staff.

Initially suspended with pay, Stalions refused to cooperate with the investigations. Michigan coach Jim Harbaugh was also suspended for three games over the scandal but returned to lead the team to a Big Ten Championship and subsequent victories in the Rose Bowl and national championship.

In summary, Connor Stalions, a former Michigan Wolverines football staffer, sent a social media post celebrating the team's national championship victory despite being fired over his alleged involvement in a sign-stealing scheme. He had been seen at previous games and was accused of purchasing tickets to games not involving Michigan. An unnamed former coach claimed Stalions paid him for recordings of future opponents. Stalions also allegedly had access to the Central Michigan sideline during a game against Michigan State. He was suspended with pay and refused to cooperate with investigations. Michigan coach Jim Harbaugh was also suspended but returned to lead the team to further victories.

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