The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arr, Patriots' captain Robert Kraft proclaims Bill Belichick's voyage with the crew hath concluded 'tween friends, by thunder!

2024-01-11

Avast, me mateys! 'Twas on Thursday's gathering when ol' Robert Kraft, that fine captain of the New England Patriots, be speakin'. He announced that the voyage with our beloved coach, Bill Belichick, had reached a jolly and peaceful conclusion.

After 24 years and six championships, Bill Belichick and the New England Patriots have agreed to part ways. In a press conference, Belichick thanked players, staffers, and fans for their contributions. He acknowledged that players win games in the NFL and expressed gratitude for coaching some of the greatest players ever. Team owner Robert Kraft described the parting as amicable, comparing it to a successful marriage. Kraft admitted that missing the playoffs in recent years played a role in the decision. Kraft reminisced about the early days of Belichick's coaching tenure and trusted his instincts in bringing him back to New England in 2000. Belichick led the Patriots to 10 Super Bowl appearances, winning 31 playoff games and 17 division titles. However, the team has struggled since the departure of Tom Brady. They have finished with losing records in three of the past four seasons and have zero playoff wins. This season, the Patriots finished with a 4-13 record, Belichick's lowest win total in his 29 seasons as a head coach. Belichick ends his Patriots tenure with a 333-178 overall record and became the third coach in NFL history to reach 300 career regular-season victories. He trails only Don Shula in total wins.

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