The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Avast ye scurvy dogs! A shipmate in robe be castin' aside the feeble attempt to keep Cap'n Trump off the ballot in New Mexico! Arrr!

2024-01-13

Avast ye, me hearties! A fancy judge be dismissin' a scallywag's attempt to keep Cap'n Trump from settin' sail in the 2024 election. This be the latest in a long line o' failed attempts to use the 14th Amendment against him. The judge, Matthew Garcia, sent that lawsuit straight to Davy Jones' locker!

In a whimsical twist of fate, a federal judge has swashbucklingly dismissed an audacious attempt to prevent former President Donald Trump from gracing the 2024 presidential primary ballot in New Mexico. This latest endeavor, based on the 14th Amendment, has been sent to Davy Jones' locker, joining a long list of similar failures.
Arr, U.S. District Judge Matthew Garcia, in a judgment delivered on January 12, thwarted the efforts of 2024 Republican presidential candidate John Anthony Castro. This daring buccaneer sought to block the 45th president's appearance on the New Mexico ballot, claiming that he had partaken in an "insurrection."
Captain Castro's lawsuit, like a cannonball aimed at the enemy, alleged that Trump's actions led to a treacherous insurrection, making him unworthy of sailing the political waters once more. However, Judge Garcia, in his infinite wisdom, saw fit to scuttle this notion, finding no merit in the claims brought forth by the aggrieved sailor.
The 14th Amendment, invoked by Castro's crew, states that no person shall hold office if they have engaged in rebellion or given aid to enemies of the nation. Yet, the judge ruled that Trump's conduct did not meet the high seas of insurrection, leaving the former captain free to roam the political seas once again.
While Castro may be walking the plank of disappointment, Trump's supporters have set sail on the glistening waters of victory. With this legal obstacle out of the way, the 45th president can continue to chart his course towards a potential comeback in the 2024 presidential race, much to the chagrin of his detractors.
As the winds of legal battles continue to blow, this latest skirmish proves that even the mightiest of swords can be parried by a vigilant judge. For now, the treasure chest of possibilities remains open for all to see, and the political stage is set for another epic showdown on the high seas of American democracy.

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