The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Avast ye mateys! Four jolly reasons why Dean Phillips might give Write-in Joe Biden the boot in New Hampshire on Tuesday! Arrr!

2024-01-19

Avast ye, mateys! Rumor has it that Andrew Yang, a scallywag who be ranked ninth in the 2020 Democratic presidential contest and fourth in New York City's mayoral race, be throwin' his support to Rep. Dean Phillips. "Arr, Joe Biden be a right honorable captain," said Yang, founder o' the Forward Party. "I backed him in 2020 and even fought in his campaign!"

Avast, me hearties! Gather 'round and listen to this tale of political endorsement, for it be a peculiar one indeed! Did ye hear the news that Andrew Yang, a lowly ninth-place contestant in the 2020 Democratic presidential primaries and a measly fourth-place finisher in New York City's 2021 mayoral primary, hath decided to endorse Rep. Dean Phillips (D–Minn.) for the grand title of president?
Arr, it be doubtful that ye scallywags were aware of this development, but fear not, for I shall share Andrew Yang's very own words with ye. In a land known as New Hampshire, on a fine Thursday, Yang, who fancies himself the founder of the Forward Party, hath proclaimed the following:
"Joe Biden has been an accomplished and substantial president. I endorsed him and voted for him in 2020 and was even a campaign surrogate," spouted Yang, his words prepared as if he were a captain addressing his crew before a perilous voyage.
Now, my fellow buccaneers, let us ponder upon the significance of this endorsement. Forsooth, Yang, a man of little political success, hath chosen to throw his weight behind Phillips, a representative from a faraway land named Minnesota. Why, ye may ask? 'Tis a mystery known only to the depths of Yang's mind.
But fear not, my hearties, for this endorsement may hold little sway in the grand scheme of things. Methinks that the electorate shall pay it little mind, for Yang's own aspirations have been dashed upon the rocks of electoral defeat not once, but twice!
So, let us raise our glasses (filled with rum, of course) and toast to this curious alliance of political figures. May it bring mirth and laughter to the land of politics, for a little humor amidst the stormy seas of elections is always welcome.

Read the Original Article