The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr! The convoy 'Take Back Our Border' be dockin' in Texas! We be wantin' to save our precious nation, mateys!"

2024-02-02

Arrr, mateys! The Take Back Our Border convoy hath sailed across the vast lands of America to raise awareness 'bout the border crisis and them dastardly "open border policies." Dr. Pete Chambers and me matey, Senate candidate Ben Luna, R-N.M., be warnin' ye on "Fox & Friends First" 'bout the growin' crisis and the cursed drugs smugglin' across the border. "The fentanyl be like a chemical warfare, I reckon. The trade o' drugs be a monstrous affliction," said...

In a language befitting a 17th-century pirate, me hearties, the Take Back Our Border convoy be on a grand adventure across the vast land of the United States. Their mission, ye see, be to draw attention to the dire state of our border and the folly of these "open border policies" that be causing havoc.
Arr, me hearties! Dr. Pete Chambers, the brave leader of this band of righteous warriors, and Ben Luna, a Senate candidate of the R-N.M. persuasion, joined the fine folks at "Fox & Friends First" to blow the horn of warning about the growing crisis. Aye, they be raising the alarm about the most fearsome of enemies—drugs!
"Avast, me mateys! Fentanyl, I say, be like a deadly chemical warfare unleashed upon our lands from across the border," proclaimed Dr. Chambers, his voice filled with righteous fury. "The drug trade be a monstrous beast that ravages our shores."
Arr, ye scurvy dogs! Can ye believe the audacity of these miscreants who dare to smuggle drugs into our great nation? The gall of it all! It be high time we put an end to this treachery and take back our border!
So, me hearties, let us rally together and fight against these open border policies that be causing chaos and allowing the drug trade to flourish. We need to protect our land, our people, and our very way of life. Together, we can reclaim what be rightfully ours, and restore order to the seas! Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

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