Arrr! Ye scallywag Anthony Rendon be sayin' baseball not be a top priority! That be a load o' bilge!
2024-02-21
Arrr, me hearties! Anthony Rendon's blabber about baseball not bein' a "top priority" be like a parrot squawkin' nonsense! Methinks the lad needs to walk the plank and swab the decks for such folly. Yarrr!
In the language of a 17th-century pirate, the scallywag Anthony Rendon confessed to the landlubbers of the media that baseball was never his true calling. The Los Angeles Angels buccaneer even considered abandoning ship back in 2014, only his second season on the high seas of the major leagues. "This be but a job," Rendon quipped. "Me faith and me kin be me treasures, afore this swashbuckling." Craig Carton, from the crew of FOX Sports, took aim at Rendon's lackluster performance, considering his hefty loot of $245 million in gold coins. The scallywag's comments were as sharp as a cutlass to the heart of the hard-working fans who scrounge up every doubloon to see their heroes play. Carton suggested the privateer should walk the plank and return his ill-gotten gains if baseball be but a trifle to him.Carton allowed that Rendon might be granted leniency if he were still the dashing hero of the Washington Nationals, plundering MVP titles and hoisting the World Series flag. Alas, Rendon's recent raids have been lacking in plunder, with measly numbers to show for his hefty bounty. The pirate also demanded a shorter season, perhaps seeking respite from the relentless battles on the diamond. Despite his past glories, Rendon's current statistics paint a grim picture of a ship adrift at sea. The scallywag's lack of dedication has left a bitter taste in the mouths of the hard-working fans who yearn for a swashbuckler willing to give his all for the treasure of victory.
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