The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Aye, the scallywag Hunter Biden be askin' for a hefty sum to dodge the hangman's noose, says his old mate!

2024-03-04

Arr matey! 'Tis said that Hunter Biden be after some gold doubloons from a shady Ukrainian fellow, whilst his old man be in charge of the ship! Aye, 'tis a tale fit for the high seas, with twists and turns like a stormy night at sea! Arrr!

Arr mateys, listen to this juicy tale of Hunter Biden and his shenanigans with a Ukrainian oligarch! It be said that one of his scallywag business partners, who be sittin' in the brig, spilled the beans to Congress about Hunter seekin' a hefty sum of $5 million from the fugitive Firtash. The lad wanted to use this treasure to try and bury a pesky U.S. indictment while his pappy was wearin' the vice president hat and steerin' the U.S.-Ukraine ship!
This here fella named Jason Galanis shared the details of this scheme from behind bars, givin' a blow-by-blow account of the dirty dealings. The story goes that the plan was to help Firtash dodge the law with a hefty pile o' doubloons. This scandalous yarn was spun for the House Oversight and Judiciary Committees, right under President Joe Biden's nose!
So there ye have it, me hearties! A tale of corruption and skullduggery fit for the high seas. Who knows what other secrets lie buried in the murky depths of Hunter Biden's past? But one thing be for certain - this be a tale that will be sung about in the taverns for years to come!

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