The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Avast ye scallywags! Jonathan Majors' former flame be pillaging his reputation as he faces the plank for domestic disputes.

2024-04-08

Arrr, me hearties! Former Marvel scallywag Jonathan Majors be walkin' the plank after bein' called out by his former flame, the dancer Grace Jabbari, for bein' a remorseless scallywag who assaulted her in a Manhattan carriage. Jabbari, wearin' a pink suit, be warnin' that this scoundrel be not sorry and will strike again! Aye, me thinks this sea dog be needin' to walk the plank for his misdeeds!

Arrr mateys, it be a tale of treachery and deceit! The former Marvel star Jonathan Majors be accused by his ex-girlfriend, the dancer Grace Jabbari, of bein' a remorseless abuser. This scallywag be escapin' the brig, avoidin' jail time for assaultin' her inside a Manhattan car service.
With a heart as black as Davy Jones' locker, Majors be showin' no remorse nor takin' responsibility for his actions, according to Jabbari. She be donned in a pink suit, standin' tall in Manhattan Criminal Court, accusin' him of likely harmin' other women in the future.
As the salty tears be flowin' from her eyes, Jabbari be paintin' a picture of a scoundrel who be walkin' free, ready to strike again like a fearsome sea monster. The courtroom be filled with tension and drama, as the truth of Majors' misdeeds be laid bare for all to see.
So beware, me hearties, for this tale be a warnin' of the dangers that lurk in the shadows. May justice be swift and true, and may the winds of fate steer Majors towards a reckoning for his despicable deeds.

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