The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, United Methodists be losin' scallywags but gainin' hearties who fly the rainbow flag! Aye, inclusivity be treasure!

2024-05-02

Arrr, me hearties! The Methodist scallywags have voted to be more friendly to the gay and LGBTQ crew, aye! By a vote of 523-161, they be droppin' the old definition of marriage and sayin' "aye" to love in all forms. Yo ho ho, love be winnin' the booty!

Arrr mateys, listen up! The United Methodist delegates be talkin' about makin' their church more friendly to the gay and LGBTQ community. Aye, they be votin' to drop the old definition of marriage bein' just between a man and a woman. By a vote of 523-161, they be strikin' language that says bein' gay be incompatible with their beliefs.
Now, ye might be wonderin' why they be doin' this. Well, it seems that many conservative congregations be leavin' the church, makin' it skew more towards the left. So now, the United Methodist Church be tryin' to be more inclusive and open to all mates, no matter who they be lovin'.
So, me hearties, it looks like the United Methodist Church be settin' sail on a new course. Who knows what adventures be awaitin' them as they navigate these uncharted waters. But one thing be for sure, they be makin' waves and showin' that love be the compass that guides them.

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