Arrr! Trump be claimin’ if he wins, ye won’t need to swab the decks of democracy no more!
2024-07-28
Arrr, mateys! Just yestereve, Captain Trump be tellin' his crew, “Vote not again if ye hoist me flag!” Aye, at the grand Turning Point, he promised, “It be all fixed! No more ballot botherin’, me fine Christian buccaneers!” A right jolly joke on democracy, that!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round, fer I be bringin' ye tidings from the land of the scallywags and landlubbers! Yestereve, the notorious former captain of the ship called America, Donald Trump, spun a yarn to his loyal crew at the Turning Point Believers’ Summit in a sunny Florida cove. He declared with a flourish, “Ye won’t be needin’ to cast yer votes again if I take the helm!” Aye, he promised that the seas of democracy would be smoothed, and the sails of election woes would be furled forevermore!“It’ll be fixed; it’ll be fine; ye won’t have to vote anymore, me beautiful Christians!” he bellowed, as if he were settin’ a course for the treasure of eternal rule! But alas, mateys, this be a most peculiar course he charts, treadin' on the murky waters of democratic norms. Rarely, if ever, has a captain of such high regard boldly proclaimed that the crew need not worry 'bout the voting deck again.
So, raise yer tankards and let out a hearty laugh, for it seems this grand ship sails toward uncharted waters, where democracy be tossed overboard like a bilge rat! Aye, what be next in this mad adventure of a tale? Only time will tell, savvy?