The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Trump be sayin’ to the faithful, “Fear not, ye won’t be needin’ yer ballots after this here election!”

2024-07-28

Arrr, me hearties! Trump be tellin' the good Christians, “Vote fer me, and in four years, ye won’t need t’ bother again! We’ll have it all shipshape!” But what be this ruckus ‘bout democracy? Seems the ol’ captain's steerin’ us into murky waters again! Har har har!

Ahoy, me hearties! Gather ‘round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout a certain scallywag named Donald Trump, who be runnin' fer the highest office in the land. T’was on a fine Friday, when this raucous rogue declared to the good Christians, “Vote fer me this November, and in four years’ time, ye won’t need to cast yer ballots again! I’ll have it all fixed up so grand, ye won’t even think of voting!” Arrr, what a jolly promise that be!

Now, me mateys, it be unclear what mischief Trump be cookin’ in his noggin with such words. His foes, those Democratic landlubbers, be shoutin’ that he be a treachery to democracy itself, and let us not forget his shenanigans tryin' to overturn the last election, which be makin’ waves like a stormy sea. Aye, he thought he could cheat the system, but the winds of fate be not so easily swayed!

So, as the winds blow and the tides turn, we be left wonderin’ if this promise be but a mirage on the horizon. Will ol' Trump turn the ship of state into a smooth sailin’ vessel, or will he merely toss the crew into a tempest? Only time will tell, me hearties! Keep yer eyes peeled and yer rum ready!

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