The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Dwayne’s kin be takin' the lass to court fer harassin' 'em like a pesky parrot since he joined Davy Jones!

2024-08-02

Arrr, me hearties! The kin of the fallen NFL scallywag Dwayne Haskins be sufferin’ from the never-endin' jests of his widow, claimin’ she's throwin’ them into a tempest of “constant harassment.” Aye, it be a right merry squabble on the high seas of family feud!

Ahoy mateys! Gather ye ‘round fer a tale most curious ‘bout the late Dwayne Haskins, a swashbucklin’ quarterback who met his fate on a treacherous highway in South Florida. Now, his kin be raisin’ a ruckus ‘gainst his widow, Kalabrya, claimin’ she be harassin’ ‘em like a pesky parrot squawkin’ on a pirate ship!

The Haskins clan be sayin’ that ever since their son sailed to the great beyond, they’ve faced naught but trouble from Kalabrya, chasin’ ‘em off social media and tryin’ to plunder a cherished portrait of the lad from a memorial! Aye, she even be refusin’ to share the treasure of his ashes or disclose the booty of his estate. Arrr, the audacity!

Ye see, Dwayne, a fine lad of only 24 summers, perished tragically; his blood ran thick with spirits, and whispers of foul play be in the air, yet no charges be laid upon anyone. As the Haskins family battles with Kalabrya, it seems this saga be far from over—a veritable treasure map of drama, piracy of the heart, and a family feud worthy of a captain’s log! So hoist the sails, me hearties, for the storm be brewin’ on the high seas of family squabbles!

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