The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Filipino gymnast snags Olympic gold and a cozy cabin! What a treasure, matey!

2024-08-03

Arrr, matey! Gymnast Carlos Yulo didn’t just snag a shiny gold coin on Saturday, but also a swanky two-bedroom treasure chest! Aye, he be the second scallywag from our shores to hoist the gold! What a merry haul for this nimble sea urchin!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn of the daring Carlos Yulo, a Filipino gymnast who danced like a swashbuckler on the floor of the grand Olympics! Last Saturday, this nimble lad bested the fearsome champion Artem Dolgopyat, snatchin' victory with a score of 15.000, just a whisker ahead of Dolgopyat’s 14.966. Aye, 'twas a battle fiercer than a stormy sea!

But wait, there be more than just shiny gold! Yulo claimed a fully furnished abode worth a king’s ransom—24 million pesos, or about $415,000! The good folk of Megaworld, celebratin' their century of Olympic cheer, bestowed upon him this treasure. “A perfect home for champions,” they proclaimed from their lofty ships in McKinley Hill, Taguig City.

Not only did our hero earn the admiration of President Marcos and a hefty bounty of 3 million pesos, but he also made history as the first Filipino male to hoist gold in artistic gymnastics! “I’m overwhelmed,” he bellowed, creditin' the heavens for his triumph. With hope for the future of gymnastics in his homeland, Yulo sails forth, seekin' more glory on the vault! Aye, the sea of triumph be callin’ him yet again!

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