Arrr, Jonathan Owens be shoutin' that his lass Simone be the finest treasure on the high seas!
2024-08-05
Avast, mateys! Simone Biles be claimin’ three golden doubloons in Paris, flauntin’ her skills like a true sea queen! Her scallywag of a husband be shoutin’ to the world, “Aye, she’s the fiercest lass on the high seas of gymnastics!” Ha! What a jolly sight!
Ahoy mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout the illustrious Simone Biles, a seven-time gold medalist who be makin’ waves in the Paris Olympics! Aye, in her third Olympic romp, she’s already hoisted three shiny golds and be eyein’ two more treasures!What a twist of fate from her trials in 2021, when she faced the dreaded twisties – a troublesome curse akin to a sailor lost at sea! Yet this fierce lass, now a sprightly 27, be takin' the stage by storm, scribblin’ her name in the annals of history!
Her matey, Jonathan Owens, a fearsome safety for the Chicago Bears, be watchin’ her shine from the stands, shoutin’ loud that his missus be the greatest of all time! He even reminded the landlubbers on X that she be THE S---! Aye, but some scallywags be givin’ him cheek for not knowin’ who she were when their romance set sail!
Biles be the second lass in Olympic lore to conquer the vault twice, and she nabbed her sixth gold with a floor routine that dazzled like treasure in the sun! Soon, she could be joinin’ the ranks of legends with nine Olympic golds! So hoist yer tankards, for this pirate gal be settin’ sail for glory!