The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Clarence Thomas be settin’ sail from the Supreme Court ship 'cause o’ Trump’s trial hullabaloo! What a merry ruckus!

2024-08-05

Ahoy, me hearties! Justice Clarence Thomas, the rogue of the Supreme Court, went against the crew on Monday, stoppin' Missouri from takin' a swing at New York over ol' Alvin Bragg's chase after Captain Trump. That scallywag's been found guilty o' 34 misdeeds and faces the hangman’s noose come September! Arrr!

Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn from the high courts of law, where justice be as murky as a pirate’s grog! Just this past Monday, in a turn of events fit fer a salty sea tale, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, a swashbuckler of the bench, decided to chart his own course. He did declare that the fine state of Missouri shan't be settin' sail to sue New York over the scallywag Alvin Bragg’s persecution of the former captain of the ship known as Trump!

Ye see, this Trump fellow—bless his treasure-hunting heart—was found guilty of fancy business record trickery, with 34 counts weighin' upon him like a chest o' gold doubloons! If the fates be kind and no storms arise, he might be sentenced come September, when the leaves turn and the winds shift. But lo, this trial ain't rocked the ship too much in the realm of his supporters, who seem to cling tighter than barnacles on a hull!

So, hoist the sails and keep yer cutlasses sharp, for the saga continues! In the court where arguments clash like cutlasses, Thomas be standin' alone, a true maverick of the legal sea, lettin' the waves of justice roll on without him!

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