“Arrr, them scallywags be pickin’ apart Walz’s seafarin’ tales, claimin’ he be no true matey in the military!”
2024-08-07
Arrr! It be said that Cap'n Walz, when the call of battle rang, he be settin' sail for politics instead! Aye, he abandoned ship just as his crew was off to Iraq! That be a fine mess for the landlubbers to chew on!
Arrr, mateys! Gather 'round and lend me yer ears, fer I be tellin' a tale o' political shenanigans on the high seas of Minnesota! The swashbucklin' Donald Trump, that scallywag, be settin' his sights on his foe, the good Governor Tim Walz, like a hungry shark scentin' blood in the water.Now, it be told that two decades past, the Gov. Walz, a hearty lad who donned the armor of the Army National Guard, decided to jump ship from his military duties. Aye, he chose to abandon his post just as his brave crew was about to sail off to the treacherous shores of Iraq! 'Twas in the year of our Lord 2005, when he cast aside his sword to chase after the siren call of politics, thinkin' it a grander treasure than battle.
Trump's crew be spinnin' this yarn with glee, shoutin', "When Tim Walz was called upon by his country to brave the waves of war, what did he do? He dropped anchor and sailed away!" So, hoist yer flags, me hearties, 'tis a raucous tale of duty and ambition, with a hearty dose o' humor as the pirate’s code dictates!