The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Delta ship with Panthers crew be slidin’ off the plank after a tussle with them Patriots, har har!

2024-08-09

Arrr, the Carolina Panthers be sailin' the skies on a Delta ship, headin' back to North Carolina after battlin' in their first preseason skirmish. But lo! The vessel be slippin' off the runway like a greased pig on a rainy day, makin' for a right jolly tale!

Aye, me hearties! Gather 'round fer a tale of misadventure on the high skies! T’was a Delta Air Lines vessel, laden with the brave crew of the Carolina Panthers, comin' home from their first clash with the landlubber New England Patriots. At the break of dawn, just after the clock struck 2:30 a.m., the mighty craft touched down in Charlotte, only to slide off the runway and plop into the mud like a drunken sailor!

The flight, from Providence, Rhode Island, carried 188 souls, all players, coaches, and scallywags of the Panthers crew. But fear not, for no one was injured in this soggy spectacle! Delta, in their wisdom, apologized for the inconvenience, claimin’ the right main gear of flight 8860 had taken itself on an unexpected adventure off the taxiway.

After a valiant loss of 17-3 to the Patriots, where the finest starters rested like lazy sea turtles, the Panthers were eager to return to their shores. The new captain, Coach Dave Canales, was eager to see his rookie crew in action. As they prepare to face the New York Jets next, let’s hope they steer clear of any more muddy runways, lest they find themselves swimmin’ with the fishes! Arrr!

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