The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr! Steph Curry be shockin’ the crew in the last hurrah, stealin’ gold at the Paris games, savvy?"

2024-08-10

Arrr, matey! Stephen Curry be blastin' through like a cannonball, tallyin' 12 points in a row! The landlubbers from France be sinkin' as the brave Yanks claim victory, 98 to 87! Aye, 'tis their fifth shiny gold doubloon from the Paris Games! Avast, what a jolly good time!

Arrr, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn of the high seas of basketball! Team USA found themselves in a tight squall, barely three points ahead with but a flickering candle of time left. Enter the legendary Steph Curry, the captain of the court, who struck like a cannonball when the winds were low!

With 2:48 left on the clock, the crafty Curry danced past the Frenchman Yabusele, unleashing a mighty 3-pointer that sent their hopes a-wobblin'. Aye, it was just the first of four treacherous shots that sank the ship of the French crew as Curry sailed to victory, his final shot ringing true as a ship’s bell!

“Bang!” went the cannon, as the ball nestled in the net, sealing their fate at 98-87. Curry, grinning like a scallywag, shared his treasure of emotions with the landlubbers at NBC, declaring it a moment of pure gold. With a bounty of 24 points, all from the mystical 3-point range, he secured his shiny medal after a fierce battle that whispered tales of glory!

The crew of Durant and Booker stood strong at 15 points each, while ol’ LeBron tossed in 14. With the fifth gold medal now hoisted high, the French crew returned home with silver, as Victor Wembanyama racked up 26 points in defeat. What a tale to tell, ye salty sea dogs!

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