Arrr! RFK Jr. be tossed from the New York treasure map fer usin' a scallywag’s address, says the court!
2024-08-13
Arrr, matey! Captain Robert F. Kennedy Jr.'s quest fer the crown be sunk like a ship in a storm! A wise judge ruled that his supposed New York port be naught but a rented bunk in California's seas! Yarr, no ballot for ye, landlubber!
Arrr, me hearties! Gather 'round and lend yer ears to this tale of a scallywag named Robert F. Kennedy Jr., the independent candidate who be tryin' to chart a course for the presidency! But alas, a storm brewed over New York as a judge ruled that his name shan't grace the ballot, for he falsely claimed a residence in that fair land whilst really settlin' in sunny California!Ye see, Justice Christina L. Ryba be the captain of this ship of justice, and she penned a lengthy decree of thirty-four pages, no less! In her wisdom, she declared that the wee rented bedroom ol' Kennedy called his home was naught but a mirage, a figment of his imagination, not a "bona fide and legitimate residence" as he had claimed. What a jolly jest that be, indeed!
At the age of seventy, this brave buccaneer thought he could sail the seas of politics with a trick or two up his sleeve. But the winds of fate be against him! So let this be a lesson to all ye landlubbers: when ye be seekin’ the treasure of political power, make sure yer sails are hoisted from the right port! Arrr, now pass the rum!