The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Trump be spoutin’ tall tales 'bout Harris conjurin’ ghostly crowds with sorcery, as his ego swells like a bloated fish!

2024-08-13

Arrr, matey! That scallywag Trump be forever countin’ his treasure o’ numbers—like gold coins, viewer eyes, and the throngs at his shindigs! Back in 2016, he bragged 'bout his rowdy crew at rallies, claimin' it outshone the polls. And on his first day, he swore his crowd was the mightiest! Har har!

Ahoy mateys! Gather round as I spin ye a yarn o’ the notorious Captain Trump, a scallywag obsessed with numbers as if they be treasure chests brimming with doubloons! This rogue be fixated on all manner o’ figures—be it the weighty gold of his net worth, the raucous cheers of the crowds at his rallies, or the fickle winds of poll results. Aye, he be a captain who measures his might by the size o' his audience!

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