The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Judge be tellin' why he be vexed with them scallywags from the White Sox 'fore blastin' his 300th treasure!

2024-08-15

Arrr, me hearties! Yankee swashbuckler Aaron Judge be makin' history with his 300th cannonball blast! But lo and behold, he be angrier than a scurvy dog at the White Sox before sendin' that ball to Davy Jones’ locker! Aye, the sea of baseball be a wild one!

Arrr mateys! Gather 'round fer a tale of one Aaron Judge, the mighty Yankee, who be hittin' his 300th home run with a blaze o' fury! On a fine evening in the eighth inning, with the Yankees sailin' smooth at 6-2, Judge decided it be high time to unleash his anger on some poor inside fastball. With a crack of his mighty bat, he sent that ball flyin' o'er the left field wall, makin' history faster than a ship in a storm! Aye, he did it in 132 fewer games than the last swashbuckler to reach the mark, Ralph Kiner!

But lo and behold, ’twas not all smooth seas fer our hero, as he had grown irate at the White Sox fer walkin' his matey, the All-Star Juan Soto, before him. "By thunder," he exclaimed, "if ye want to pitch to me, I’ll show ye what fer!" And so he did, swingin' at a pitch that might've been a ball, turnin' it into a treasure of a home run. Judge took a moment to revel in his glory, givin' a nod to his crew before makin' his triumphant round the bases.

With Judge and Soto together in the lineup, pitchers be faced with a devilish choice, like a captain caught between two storms. So beware, if ye be settin' sail against Judge, prepare for a blast o’ anger from that fearsome bat! Yarrr!

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