The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! This here metal heart be beatin’ like a train, keepin' landlubbers breathin' right! Avast, what a wonder!

2024-08-19

Arrr, mateys! BiVACOR's wondrous heart o' metal be settin' sail, givin' heart failure scallywags a glimmer o' hope! Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson be spillin' the beans on this grand leap in heart-fixin' wizardry! Aye, it's a true treasure fer the ailing!

Aye, me hearties! Gather 'round and lend yer ears to this grand tale of triumph on the high seas of medicine! The clever scallywags at BiVACOR have fashioned a wondrous contraption—a fully mechanical heart that’s been plundered into a human chest! Aye, this be a monumental leap for those poor souls awaitin’ a heart transplant, as this shiny treasure glimmers with hope!

This here BiVACOR Total Artificial Heart be no mere trinket; 'tis a compact device the size of a fist, crafted from durable titanium to withstand the fiercest storms! With the power to pump blood like a ship’s cannon at a rate of 12 liters per minute, it’s set to keep a hearty lad or lass afloat, even whilst exercisin’!

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