The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, word be from the crow's nest! Steve Kerr be sailin' away from the helm of USA Basket!

2024-08-19

Arrr, matey! Steve Kerr, just back from plunderin' gold at the 2024 Paris Games, be rumored to hang up his coachin' boots! Aye, no more swabbin' the decks for USA Basketball, savvy? The sea be callin'—or perhaps a nice hammock!

Ahoy, mateys! It be news from the high seas of sportin’ glory! Steve Kerr, the captain of the USA Basketball ship, seems ready to set sail after snaggin’ just one golden doubloon at the grand Olympics. Rumor has it, the lad won’t be hoistin’ the flag for the men’s crew no more, as he be expected to step aside after their shiny triumph in Paris 2024!

Word from the sea-farin’ newsmen, Marc Stein, be that Kerr’s time as head honcho has come to a close. Who shall take the helm? Perhaps Erik Spoelstra of the Miami Heat or Tyronn Lue of the Clippers, both mighty fine coaches with a treasure trove of skills!

Kerr, who jumped aboard Team USA since 2016, guided the crew to a gold haul in both Rio and Tokyo before takin’ the captain’s chair himself. Yet, after a rocky ride at the 2023 FIBA World Cup, where they finished fourth, some landlubbers questioned his captaincy. But fear not! Under his watch, the lads rose to glory, vanquishing France to secure their fifth golden haul!

With the likes of Steph Curry and LeBron James at his disposal, Kerr had to make some tough calls, even callin’ himself a daft scallywag for benchin’ stars like Tatum! As the seas calm, the search for a new captain begins, with hopes high for the next grand adventure in Los Angeles 2028!

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