The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, the Biden crew's plans for Title IX be sinkin' faster than a soggy ship, matey!

2024-08-21

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round and feast yer eyes upon the weekly treasure map of sportin' shenanigans from across the seven seas! From swashbucklin’ matches to landlubber blunders, ye won’t miss a single jest or jesters! Prepare to be entertained, savvy? Arrr!

Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I regale ye with the tales of the high seas of politics and sports! The Supreme Court, like a tempestuous captain, hath cast aside the Biden crew's plea to alter Title IX, keepin' the sails steady on the current rules. Caitlyn Jenner, a fierce sea dog of the Olympic seas, be callin' this news "great," suggestin' the winds of change ain't blowin' in the right direction for Biden's crew!

Meanwhile, Coach Steve Kerr, liken'd to a jolly old sea captain, jested about sendin' Trump to Davy Jones' locker with a cheeky "night, night!" And Magic Johnson, a towering legend of the court, declared the Obamas’ speeches to be the finest words ever sailed upon the winds of history!

But beware, mateys! Tua Tagovailoa, the Dolphins’ quarterback, be throwin' shade like a storm cloud, callin' his old captain a “terrible person.” As the winds shift, Coach Brian Flores be takin' the high road, wishin' the lad naught but fair winds! So hoist yer flags and prepare for the next adventure, for the seas of sport and politics be ever tumultuous!

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