The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Tim Walz be sharin' tales of his kin's IVF voyage, but they charted a fresh course, savvy?

2024-08-21

Ahoy mateys! In the merry month of March, after Alabama’s court put the kibosh on makin’ wee ones in test tubes, Minnesota’s Gov. Tim Walz shared his trials with his lass, Gwen. He even sent a treasure map of a fundraiser titled “Our IVF Adventure”! Arrr, politics be a jolly sea!

Ahoy mateys! Gather 'round fer a tale of woe and whimsy upon the high seas of parenthood! In the month of March, when the winds of Alabama blew ill tidings, a court be raisin' its sails against in vitro fertilization. Aye, it be a cruel fate fer many a hopeful couple! But fear not, fer Minnesota’s gallant captain, Governor Tim Walz, took to the helm with a heart full of dreams, sharin’ the trials he faced with his fair wife, Gwen, in their quest fer wee buccaneers of their own.

Like a true sailor, he cast forth a missive to his crew, a fundraisin' email dubbed “our IVF journey,” ye see. Inside, tales of his family's brave adventure in the realm of IVF were spun, like yarns of olde! But the winds of politics be blowin’ harsh, as Walz be takin’ aim at Ohio’s own Sen. JD Vance—an adversary who be wishin' to sink the ship o' parental dreams. Walz declared, “If it was up to him, I wouldn’t have a…,” hintin' at the cruel fate that might await if Vance be the captain at the helm. Aye, the seas of politics be treacherous, but Walz be steerin’ his ship with humor and heart! So raise a tankard to the trials of parenthood and the tales spun upon the stormy seas!

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