“I be checkin’ Joe Biden’s DNC tale, fer CNN be too scallywag to do it! Har har har!”
2024-08-21
Arrr, the scurvy mainstream press, save for that landlubber Daniel Dale from CNN, be as useful as a barnacle on a ship's hull! So, our matey Larry decided to hoist the sails of truth and tackle Joe Biden's yarns himself, lest we be led astray by bilgewater tales!
Arrr mateys! Gather 'round and lend me yer ears, fer I’ve a tale of treachery on the high seas o' news! The mainstream media, like a scurvy crew of landlubbers, be shirking their sacred duty of truth-tellin', save fer one brave soul, Daniel Dale o' CNN—bless his heart, but his fact-checkin' be as feeble as a one-legged parrot! Aye, he be makin' excuses more pitiful than a bilge rat caught in a barrel o' rum!So what be a true swashbuckler to do? Enter Larry, a land-loving sailor with a heart full of courage and a mind sharper than a cutlass! Armed with naught but a quill and the spirit of adventure, he set sail upon the choppy waters of Joe Biden's speech, ready to chart the course of truth! With each word, Larry be dissectin' the fabrications and half-truths like a surgeon o' the seas, his wit as keen as a swordfish's bill!
The seas may be stormy and the crew uncertain, but fear not, me hearties! For in this grand theater of nonsense, Larry be our captain, steerage in hand, facin' down the tempest of misinformation! So hoist the sails and let the truth be known, for a pirate’s code be never strayin’ from the facts, even when the winds o' deceit be blowin' fierce!