Arrr, matey! The scallywag who cried foul against Dwight Howard be tossin’ his lawsuit overboard! What a merry jest!
2024-08-21
Arrr, matey! The court's gavel struck down the claims 'gainst the once-mighty Dwight Howard, who be accused of mischief most foul! The landlubbers filed their gripes in July, but come Monday, they were sent sailin' with naught but a hearty laugh! Avast, justice be a fickle sea!
Ahoy mateys! Gather 'round as I regale ye with a tale of a scallywag named Dwight Howard, once a star of the bouncy ball court, now findin' himself in stormy seas o' legal trouble! A lawsuit claimin' foul deeds was launched by a landlubber named Stephen Harper, but lo and behold, the judge tossed it overboard on Monday, dismissing it without so much as a second glance.This here messy yarn began back in July 2023, with Harper accusin’ Howard of all sorts of nasty business from an encounter back in July 2021—aye, the plot thickens! Harper claimed emotional distress and even false imprisonment, but Howard shot back that what transpired was as consensual as a pirate's toast o’ rum!
With a swift flick of his legal might, Howard declared these claims to be naught but a treasure hunt for coin! His crew o' lawyers spouted that it be a mere case of unrequited love—after one night of swashbucklin’ fun, Howard was no longer interested in keepin' the scallywag’s company.
And so it goes, the winds of fortune blowin’ in favor of our lad Dwight, as the court sets sail away from this raucous affair! So hoist yer flags high and let this be a lesson—never mix courtrooms and consensual capers, or ye might just find yerself walkin’ the plank! Arrr!