Arrr! Riley Gaines be waxin' poetic 'bout lasses' rights at Trump’s shindig, stirrin' up the waters o' swimmin' squabbles!
2024-08-23
Arrr, matey! Former sea swimmer Riley Gaines took to the stage at Trump’s jolly gathering in Glendale, Arizona, shoutin’ she’ll cast her lot fer the captain ‘cause she be a wench, savvy? Aye, even the fiercest of lassies be havin’ their say on the high seas of politics!
Arrr, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout the fair lass Riley Gaines, a bold swimmer of the collegiate seas! This past Friday, she be settin’ sail to the grand rally of former Captain Trump in Glendale, Arizona. With a heart full of fervor, she declared, "I be votin' for Donald J. Trump 'cause I be a woman!" Aye, that’s the spirit!Gaines, the anchor for the "Gaines for Girls" podcast, shared the stage with a hearty crew of Republican buccaneers, includin' Kari Lake and other swashbucklin’ representatives from Arizona. She took a jab at the wenches and scallywags who vote for Kamala Harris simply ‘cause she wears a dress, claimin’ that Democrats be opposin’ the rights of the fairer sex!
She called out the Democrats for their views on matters that matter to women, like school choice and parental rights, proving that not all treasure be sparkly! She even took a shot at the notion that men be claimin’ they can bear young 'uns and that tampons should grace the gents' quarters!
Now, she’s set to testify in Georgia, recountin’ her tales of competition with the infamous Lia Thomas among other All-American lasses, helpin’ to right the ship for women’s sports. Aye, let’s hope the winds favor her cause! Arrr!