The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr! Harris be floatin’ high on a sea o’ Democrat votes, sayin’ beware the pollsters’ trickery, ye scallywags!"

2024-09-02

Arrr, me hearties! The fair Kamala be sailin’ ahead in the polls, though some say the winds be blowin’ too favorably for her crew! The Democrats be hootin’ and hollerin’ as she’s catchin’ up to that scallywag Trump, who once ruled the seas of polling. Aye, what a merry jest!

Ahoy, ye landlubbers! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout the fair Vice President Kamala Harris, who be makin' waves in the treacherous seas of polls! Aye, the word on the wind be that her lead may be as inflated as a blusterin' pirate's tale, thanks to a crew of pollsters oversampling them Democratic scallywags!

The Democrats be celebratin' like a crew findin' treasure 'neath a buried X, for Ms. Harris be closin' the gap on that ol' seadog, Donald Trump. Why, she even be surpassin' him in the wide blue yonder of national polls and in some battleground ports! Just a fortnight past, the Trumpster was plunderin' the poll charts, leadin' like a captain with a full hold o’ gold doubloons.

But lo and behold! Ms. Harris be comin' on strong like a gale wind, with her sails fully unfurled! Critics be whisperin' that this be a cunning plan to give her momentum a mighty boost, like shovin' a cannonball down a cannon! So, keep yer spyglasses trained on this high-seas drama, me hearties, for the political waters be choppy, and the winds of fortune change quicker than a pirate’s mood after a mug o' rum!

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