The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Jerry be ponderin' if he can keep Dak aboard and sail the Cowboys to victory, or be marooned!

2024-09-05

Arrr, me hearties! Captain Jerry Jones be settin' sail on talks 'twixt his crew and the fine quarterback Dak Prescott! On the horizon of contract negotiations, ye see? Aye, he be spillin' the beans in an interview this Wednesday, like a parrot squawkin' treasure maps! Arrr!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn o' Jerry Jones, the captain of the Dallas Cowboys, a-comin' to grips with a troublesome contract for his quarterback, Dak Prescott. In a parley with the infamous Stephen A. Smith, ol' Jerry cast doubt on whether he could fill Prescott's treasure chest while still havin' doubloons left to hire a proper crew.

Jones be frettin' over the many pieces of eight already spent on Prescott, who's set to weigh down the ship with a hefty $40 million against the salary cap if he sails to another crew. “Arrr, it’s not just Dak’s burden,” he grumbled, “it’s the Cowboys’ curse!” And savvy sailors know, it ain't just Prescott he’s wranglin' with, for CeeDee Lamb's gold-laden contract and Micah Parsons eyein' the richest bounty for a non-quarterback only add to the stormy seas.

Meanwhile, Prescott be heedless of the captain's ramblings, sayin' he stopped listenin' to Jones' tales long ago! “Aye, it’s more about the ship than the captain’s fancy words!” he proclaimed. As the winds of contract negotiations howl, one can’t help but wonder if Jones will keep his crew afloat or if he’ll find himself marooned in a sea of financial woes!

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