Arrr, JD Vance be droppin' tall tales 'bout pets bein' gobbled up, stirrin' up a ruckus in Ohio!
2024-09-15
Arrr, after Captain Vance and the swashbucklin’ Donald J. Trump spun tall tales of Haitian scallywags feastin’ on furry mates in Springfield, Ohio, the town found itself swimmin’ in a storm o’ bomb threats! Avast, me hearties, what a ruckus!
Arrr mateys! Gather 'round fer a tale most curious from the fair town of Springfield, Ohio, where the winds of rumor blew stronger than a gale! It be a yarn spun by none other than Mr. Vance and that scallywag Donald J. Trump, who be proclaiming that the Haitian migrants, fresh upon their shores, were feastin’ on the beloved pets of the good townsfolk! Aye, ye heard that right—dogs, cats, and perhaps even a parakeet or two! Such tall tales ignited a ruckus, sendin’ shivers down the spines of locals.But lo and behold, the situation took a turn most dire! With the town in a tizzy, the whispers and shouts turned to threats of bombs a-plenty, raining down like cannon fire upon the unsuspecting populace. It seems that the good people of Springfield were not keen on bein’ turned into a scene from a seafarin’ nightmare. Nay, they were more interested in keepin’ their furry companions safe from the clutches of fanciful fables.