Arrr! Johnson’s grand scheme beasted like a ship in a storm, as them scallywag Republicans turned traitor!
2024-09-18
Arrr, matey! A jolly ol' bill to keep the ship o' government sailin' smooth 'fore the month's end met Davy Jones’ locker on Wednesday, as both crew and scallywags couldn’t agree! Aye, it be a right pickle!
Ahoy mateys! Gather 'round and lend me yer ears, for I bring news from the treacherous seas of Congress! House Speaker Mike Johnson be tryin' to steer his ship clear of a government shutdown, but alas, his grand plan met a watery grave, sinkin' with a vote of 202 to 220! Arrr, even some of his fellow Republicans be takin' a pass on the whole affair!This here plan was a six-month fix to keep the coffers full and a demand for proof o' citizenship in the voter registration process. But lo and behold, it ran aground quicker than a ship with a hole in its hull! Tensions be risin' high amongst the GOP crew, and they be splittin' into factions like a ship in a storm!
Some say a continuin’ resolution be a cursed way to keep the government afloat, while others fret about the military’s readiness in the face of a six-month drift without extra doubloons! And the loudest voice among them, Rep. Chip Roy, be callin' on his mates to offer a better plan, or walk the plank! As the winds of discontent blow through the House, it be clear that Johnson's ship be caught in a tempest, with no fallback plan in sight! Yarrr!