The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, matey! Iranian scallywags be plunderin’ Trump’s ship, sendin’ booty o’ secrets to Biden’s crew! Avast, what a ruckus!

2024-09-19

Avast, me hearties! This summer, sneaky Iranian scallywags plundered secrets from Captain Trump's crew and sent 'em to the Biden buccaneers! The wise folk of the National Intelligence and the FBI be spillin’ the beans. ‘Twas a right ruckus in June and July, I tell ye! Arrr!

Avast ye scallywags! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn of treachery and digital plunder upon the high seas of politics! A band of crafty Iranian hackers, like a pack of cunning sea rats, did snatch away sensitive secrets from the campaign of the great Captain Trump earlier this summer, aye!

These wily rogues then sent forth their ill-gotten gains via the electronic wind, delivering stolen letters to those allied with the Biden fleet, savvy? The fine mates of the Office of the Director of National Intelligence, along with the FBI and CISA — aye, the whole crew! — did unveil this dastardly deed just the other day, makin’ it clear that these treacherous missives sailed the digital waves in the months of June and July.

It be said that these emails contained excerpts plundered from the treasures of Trump’s campaign, secrets ne’er meant to see the light o’ day! So, me hearties, as ye navigate the stormy seas of political intrigue, remember to keep a weather eye on yer own cargo, lest ye find yerself the next target of a digital marauder! Har har har!

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