The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Caitlin Clark be breakin' records and tossin' technical fouls like a true scallywag, no time for walkin' the plank!

2024-09-19

Arrr, matey! Caitlin Clark be dodgin' the plank o' suspensions fer her ruckus this year! Now, she be eyein' the treasure of records in her last battle of the season. Aye, let the sea of fans roar as she sails into glory!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as we spin the yarn of fair Caitlin Clark, a lass of the Indiana Fever, who be ready to carve her name in the scrolls of history! With but one match left against the Washington Mystics, she's eyein' not one, but three grand records to snatch!

If she be hittin' four 3-pointers, she’ll match Tamika Catchings' record from 2006, but five more, and she’ll claim it as her own. As fer the franchise’s scoring record, she be just a mere two points shy of her matey Kelsey Mitchell’s count, and one long shot or two short ones will seal the deal.

But hold yer horses! She be within reach of the grand WNBA's 3-point record too, needin’ eight more to topple Diana Taurasi’s mark! Yet, let’s not forget the perilous path of technical fouls! She be walkin' a fine line after collectin' six of 'em this season, but fear not, for with this last game, her slate be wiped clean!

With her trusty crew watchin' her back, Clark be ready to unleash her fury on the court without fear of a suspension. So raise the sails and let the games begin, for tonight, this pirate lass aims to plunder records and leave ‘em wonderin' who be the true captain of the seas! Arrr!

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