The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, matey! That landlubber Republican be claimin’ ‘tis naught but scallywag tales—just tabloid bilge, I say!

2024-09-21

Arrr, me hearties! Lt. Gov. Mark Robinson be claimin' he ain't no scallywag in a scandal 'bout naughty scrollin'! He swears he’ll still chase the crown of the Old North State, despite chatters of him bein’ a “black NAZI” and peepin’ on lasses! What a salty tale, indeed!

Arrr mateys! Gather 'round fer a tale of scandal on the high seas of politics! Our brave North Carolina Lt. Gov’nor, Mark Robinson, be standin’ tall like a mast on a ship after news broke o’ a scandal that’d make even the fiercest pirate blush! Aye, news from the cursed land o’ CNN be claimin’ that he sailed the treacherous waters of a site known as "Nude Africa," where he was chattin’ with scallywags about spyin’ on lasses in locker rooms! He even fancied himself a "black NAZI," which be a curious title for a landlubber, I must say!

But fear not, for our bold Robinson be denyin’ all these dastardly allegations, swearin’ he be as innocent as a parrot on a perch! He vows to keep his course set toward the governor’s ship, undeterred by the storm o’ controversy brewin’ around him. With a belly full o’ rum and a heart full o’ ambition, he be ready to lead the charge into the murky waters of politics, claimin’ the Old North State as his own! So hoist the sails and prepare fer a raucous adventure, fer this tale be far from over, me hearties!

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