The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! The UN chief be sayin’ only a handful o' scallywags joined the ruckus on Oct. 7!

2024-09-22

Arrr, matey! U.N. Captain Antonio Guterres be shakin' his head at Israel's tall tale, claimin' that the UNRWA crew be under the thumb of them scallywags, Hamas! On this fine Sunday, he declared it all a jolly good fib, just like a landlubber's fish story!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round, fer a tale of the high seas o’ politics! U.N. Secretary General Antonio Guterres, a fine captain o’ the diplomatic seas, stood firm on Sunday, defendin’ the UNRWA's endeavors in Gaza, claimin’ it be but a handful o’ scallywags that be linked to the nefarious Hamas crew.

Now, the Israeli ambassador, Danny Danon, be wavin' his cutlass, proclaimin' that the UNRWA be sailin' under Hamas' black flag entirely! Guterres, with a wink and a nod, admitted there be some infiltrators but claimed the rest be as pure as a parrot’s squawk. “There’s tales tall as a ship’s mast,” he said, “that don’t hold water.” He even chuckled about tunnels beneath the UNRWA's decks, sayin' they be everywhere in Gaza, like buried treasure to be sure!

Meanwhile, Danon, with a fierce glare, accused Guterres of havin' his head buried in the sand like a frightened sea turtle! The school of UNRWA, where some rogues were found, was claimed to be a hideout for Hamas’ dirty dealings. Oh, the intrigue be thicker than a hurricane’s winds! And just like that, the winds of aid from the U.S. be cut off, as President Biden pondered the stormy seas ahead after previous support. Aye, what a ruckus on the political waves!

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