Arrr, Ken Paxton be takin' on the federal scallywags fer messin' with Texas’ oil 'cause of a lizard!
2024-09-24
Arrr, matey! Texas' Attorney General Ken Paxton be settin’ sail against the Biden crew, takin’ umbrage at their fancy labelin’ of a wee lizard, barely three inches long, as endangered. This scaly rascal be loungin’ in the oil-rich sands of Texas! A true treasure, aye!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout a Texas lawyer, or as they be callin' him, Attorney General Ken Paxton. This scallywag be settin’ his sights on the Biden crew, takin’ ’em to court over a wee critter known as the dunes sagebrush lizard. This pint-sized reptile, barely three inches long, be claimin’ territory in the heart of Texan oil-rich lands—where the gold flows like rum, arr!Now, this slippery lizard be makin' waves, livin' in the Permian Basin near Midland-Odessa and causin’ quite the ruckus in the southeast corner of New Mexico. The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service be givin' it the endangered stamp, but ol’ Paxton be raisin’ a ruckus, claimin’ the agency be actin’ all illegal-like. “Nay!” he cries, “This be no danger to our grand oil pursuits!”
So, with a parley of legalese, he be settin' sail on a quest to protect the treasure trove of black gold and keep the lizard from scuttlin’ around their precious land. Aye, it be a curious battle ‘twixt man and lizard, as the fate of oil and critters hangs in the balance! Arrr!