The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Zelenskyy be sayin’ Vance’s scheme to gift Russia plundered land be stirrin’ seas of trouble, matey!

2024-09-24

Arrr! The Ukrainian captain be spittin’ fire at JD Vance's scheme, sayin’ handin’ over treasure to the Russian scallywags be a fool’s errand! If ye let might rule, ye be stirrin’ a global tempest fit for Davy Jones himself! Keep yer cutlasses sharp, mateys!

Arrr mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn about the tempestuous waters of politics! In a recent parley with the New Yorker, Ukrainian Captain, er, President Volodymyr Zelenskyy, tossed caution to the wind and unleashed a broadside against that salty Republican scallywag, Sen. JD Vance! Aye, Zelenskyy called the lad "radical" and warned that his ideas might lead to a global ruckus rather than peace, like a ship headed straight for a storm!

The crew of Vance's ship be proposing a plan to hand over Ukraine's treasure—territory—‘cause he thinks it’d stop the Russian marauders. But Zelenskyy be sayin’ that this would set sail for chaos, where strength rules the seas and might be the only right!

Despite his spat with Vance, Zelenskyy shared that ol’ Trump had been on his good side, yappin’ sweet words like "I understand." But he warned that Trump may just be blowin’ smoke with no real map to peace. As Zelenskyy prepares to meet with Biden and chart a course for victory, he be callin’ on the bravest allies to support Ukraine. For in this wild sea of war, a strong Ukraine be the winds that will blow Putin to the negotiating table! Yarrr!

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