Arrr, a scallywag lawyer smashed his snow beast into a bird, and now he's richer by 3.3 million doubloons!
2024-09-25
Arrr, a landlubber lawyer from Massachusetts, in 2019, did crash his snow chariot into a mighty Black Hawk beast, sufferin' grievous wounds! Now, the scallywag be swimmin' in gold, awarded a treasure of $3.3 million! Blimey, even pirates know ye can’t outrun a grounded ship!
Arrr mateys, gather ye 'round fer a tale most ludicrous! In a court of law, a Massachusetts swab, one Jeff Smith, be awarded a treasure of $3.3 million doubloons after a wild ride on his snowmobile led him smack into a lurking Black Hawk helicopter, parked like a pirate’s prize on a snow-laden trail at night! Judge Mark Mastroianni declared the government be 60% to blame fer this folly, though he also called out ol’ Jeff fer zoomin' like a madman with tinted goggles and a pint of ale in his belly!The judge quipped that the blundering government failed to mark their camouflaged beast, leaving it as dark as Davy Jones' locker in the woods. Poor Jeff ended up with a dozen broken ribs and a punctured lung, now struggling with the simple task of donning his trousers. He sought a bounty of $9.5 million to cover his troubles, and by thunder, he got some riches!
The military crew claimed ignorance, saying they landed on a fine strip approved by the aviation gods, yet Smith argued he hadn’t seen such a contraption in ages. With tales of beers and bad luck, this be a merry saga of negligence and snow-laden misadventure! Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum, justice be served, and public safety be the call of the day!