The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Augusta National be reckonin’ the wreckage after Hurricane Helene turned their fair greens into a salty sea!

2024-09-28

Arrr, me hearties! Captain Fred Ridley o' the Augusta National's ship be sendin' word on Saturday: the grand ol' course, hostin' the Masters, be checkin' fer scallywag damage from that tempestuous Hurricane Helene! Avast, hope the greens be still intact fer a jolly good swingin’!

Ahoy, mateys! 'Twas a tempest of monstrous proportions, Hurricane Helene be rollin' through the fair greens of Augusta National, leavin' naught but chaos in her wake! With winds howlin' at a fearsome 140 mph, she laid waste to the picturesque course, takin' with her at least 52 souls and plungin' millions into darkness, argh!

Fred Ridley, the esteemed captain o' the club, declared that their hearts be heavy for the good people o' Augusta, who be sufferin' from this foul squall. Their thoughts be focused on their fellow buccaneers and their plundered homes, not just the greens that be needin' repair after the storm's wrath.

With trees down and the grand Magnolia Lane lookin' like a pirate’s ship after a cannonball barrage, the fairway be in a sorry state indeed! Georgia's own Gov. Brian Kemp be declarin' the devastation as if a cannonball had struck the land, and he speaks true, mateys!

So raise a tankard for those weathered by this calamity, whilst the Augusta folk plot their repair course! May the winds be kinder in the days to come, or we’ll need more than just a good crew to clean up this mess, savvy?

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