The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, matey! Assange be claimin’ he’s locked up for tellin' tales! Blimey, that be a fine jest!

2024-10-01

Arrr, me hearties! Julian Assange, the scallywag of WikiLeaks, be sayin' in yonder Strasbourg that bein' tossed in chains be a perilous tale for all! Aye, if they be lockin' up a rogue for spillin' secrets, what'll they do to a parrot that squawks too loud? Har har!

Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn o' a scallywag named Julian Assange, the infamous founder o' WikiLeaks! This rogue, captured and bound in the dungeons o' imprisonment, be makin' waves with his bold words in the fair city o' Strasbourg, France!

"Arrr," he be sayin', "me confinement be settin' a perilous precedent fer all landlubbers who dare tread the waters of free speech!" Aye, he claims that if they be lockin' up a salty sea dog like him fer spillin' the beans, who among us be safe from the clutches o' the law? He be raisin' the black flag o' concern, warnin' that the mighty powers that be be sailin' into uncharted territory, where the truth be walkin' the plank!

With a twinkle in his eye and a spirit as rebellious as a tempestuous sea, Assange be challengin' the world to consider the fate o' free expression. He be stirrin' the pot, claimin' that this be not just a tale o' a single pirate, but a dire warning to all who dare to speak their minds! So hoist yer mugs, me mateys, and toast to the cap'n Assange, as he battles the stormy seas of censorship and tyranny!

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