The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr, the posh lads o' the scholarly seas who can't decipher a scroll to save their scallywag souls!"

2024-10-01

Arrr, matey! Nicholas Dames be teachin' the fine arts of Literature at Columbia since the year o' our Lord 1998! He be lovin' the gig, but the scallywags be drownin' in tomes! Aye, they be bewildered by the thought of readin' more than a handful o' scrolls each semester!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout a learned seafarer named Nicholas Dames, a master of Literature Humanities at Columbia University since the year of our Lord, 1998. Aye, he be lovin' his trade, but the winds of change be blowin’ fiercely!

In these past ten years, the young scallywags in his crew—er, class—have found themselves adrift in a stormy sea of books, lettin’ out cries of despair at the thought of readin’ more than a handful o’ tomes in a single semester. Why, it be a wonder if they even know which way is up! They’ve always been a bit lazy in their swabbin’ of pages, but now, it seems, they be more bewildered than a landlubber in a tempest!

Dames and his fellow wise sea dogs have noticed that these fresh-faced buccaneers no longer arrive at the classroom ready to tackle the vast treasures of knowledge. Nay, instead, they look like fish outta water! So, as the tides of education shift, this noble captain of literature be ponderin' how to steer his crew back to calmer waters, lest they be lost in the fog of ignorance forever! Arrr!

Read the Original Article