The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Ka'imi Fairbairn just sent a cannonball o’ a kick, claimin’ victory over the Bills from 59 yards, matey!

2024-10-06

Arrr, matey! Ka'imi Fairbairn be hittin' a cannonball straight through the goalposts from 59 paces, claimin' victory over them scallywags, the Buffalo Bills! Aye, 'twas a day when Captain Josh Allen floundered like a fish outta water. 23-20, and the Texans be celebratin' like true buccaneers!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather ‘round fer a tale of the Houston Texans who, with a mighty swing o’ the leg, be settin’ sail to a grand 4-1 record, thanks to one Ka'imi Fairbairn, who be drilling a 59-yard field goal as the sands o’ time ran out against the Buffalo Bills! Aye, them Bills be sunkin’ to a 3-2 fate, blowin’ their chances like a ship lost at sea!

Now, the Texans started like a ship in full sail, but the winds changed when Captain Josh Allen took command after the half, blastin’ a cannon fire that scored a touchdown. But lo and behold, Allen had the accuracy of a blindfolded parrot, hittin’ only 9 of 30 throws, yet it was enough to keep ‘em afloat for a spell!

Despite the Texans’ crew steerin’ clear with a 14-3 lead, Allen’s Bills clawed their way back like barnacles on a ship's hull. But alas, the Texans’ defense held firm, lettin’ Fairbairn unleash his kicker’s fury at the end, settin’ sail to victory! And while Stroud be without his speedy mate, Collins, he still tossed the ball like a seasoned seadog! Arrr, it be a clash of titans, with the Texans claimin’ the treasure in the end! So hoist the sails, fer this season be far from over!

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