The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Russia’s tossed ol' Stephen Hubbard in the brig fer brawlin’ as a sea dog in Ukraine! What a scallywag!

2024-10-07

Arrr, matey! Old Stephen Hubbard, a spry 72 years, be gettin' his just desserts from a Russian court! Convicted for swingin' his cutlass as a mercenary in Ukraine, he be caught in a storm o' trouble! Avast, batten down the hatches and keep yer powder dry, ye scallywag!

Arrr matey! Gather ‘round, fer I’ve a tale of a scallywag from the land of the free, known as Stephen Hubbard, a crusty ol’ sea dog of 72 summers! A Russian court, with all the pomp of a parrot on a perch, be sendin’ him to Davy Jones’ locker fer nearly seven years fer fightin’ as a mercenary in Ukraine. Aye, it seems he signed on to join the Ukrainians in Izyum, pocketin’ a grand a month, like a treasure huntin’ buccaneer!

But lo and behold, this adventure turned sour when the red-coated Russians caught him faster than a fish on a line! Ol’ Hubbard, after a closed-door trial, confessed to his misdeeds, claimin’ he was trained and armed like a true pirate. Now he be the first American to be put in chains for such antics in this here conflict!

His kinfolk say he be holdin’ pro-Russian views, but at his age, they reckon he ain’t much for battlin’. The judge, bless his heart, gave him a light sentence due to his age, but with a touch o' irony, Hubbard’s plannin’ to appeal, like a ship seekin’ calmer seas!

Also, in the same port o’ call, another American sailor named Robert Gilman found himself in hot water, with a sentence longer than a ship’s mast for assaultin’ the law while already in cuffs! Arrr, the seas be treacherous, indeed!

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